Graal leads to depression because it lacks content. The collective unconsciousness has a very real interpretation of "Holy Graal"; it represents something deeper, richer, holy, powerful, magical, and more meaningful. A virtual reality follows similar if not nearly exact principles of the drama of the theater of society. However, what happens a lot of times is that what is created in the spirit of goodness, gets finagled by actors/power-hungry men & turned into a cheap thrill. They take the beauty of the unfolding reality, hijack it, and then amp up the economic obsession to create a hamster wheel.

America, first of all, is a land of pirates; pirates flew across the sea, hijacked some land, and created a casino reality. Sure, it's amusing, and very stimulating, but in the end it is a hamster wheel of emptiness if you "go with the flow"—and it is meticulously designed to be so, because those who took power want you to continue throwing quarters into an unrewarding experience that appeals to lust & gore.

But it isn't reality; it's an ensemble of smooth-talking narratives for groups of "rulers" battling against each other in the name of "peace" & "glory". America worships the theater; and the person who controls the server here does as well. He took what was made and amped up people's obsession with vanity (clothing/lust) & gore (fighting) to milk them for money among something that was intended to be way more spiritual; inspiration only comes to the spiritual.

Thus, you enter into the beauty of what innocence makes—the stunted dawning of something much more rich, religious, and transcendent—but in the end you find yourself running around a hamster wheel of incomplete, hijacked economic power plays in a casino designed specifically to hook & entertain you without rewarding you. It leads to depression, because you invest so much time & entertainment into it; your subconscious sees the beauty & purity created by innocence—but unlike Zelda, the game was stolen long ago to be nothing more than a drug to keep pumping you with adrenaline & arousal after good people made something beautiful.

You become tired. You look around you in real life & see that capitalism is the same thing. A bunch of mindless drones being told "they can be kings too if they work hard enough", obsessed with the latest fashion, technology, and entertainment—zipping around—but missing something very, very deep. You go to bed at night, your parents come home from serving a dollar all day & party it up in the night—keeping you awake—& you feel like nothing but a tool in a machine.

I see why you're depressed. Then, you look out into the land of pirates who want your power, and they offer you hope for a high price in the name of advanced education … And you wonder what your purpose is going to be. You go to the churches, and it's the same thing that happened before Rome collapsed. A bunch of people in suits barking manipulated interpretations of something religious to milk people in an addiction for a dollar.

Anime is slightly amusing; but then it's riddled with hyper-sexualized, garbage plots, garbage animation, and terribly produced sound-effects because a bunch of capitalists wrung it together to make a quick dollar.

When you get to the rabbit hole, and everyone says, "Don't go in, it's a trap!"—
I say—follow the little white rabbit.  

Posted by *Dae

Zetectic it sounds like you have a few symptoms of depression. There's nothing wrong with playing games or even watching anime but in moderation but when they become your main goals you may have a problem. If you feel like your playing graal too much you should try and stop same with watching anime and replace them with other hobbies.

I've also seen a few people recommend going on medication, in my opinion that shouldn't be the first step. I think I saw you post a while ago on the fitness thread, I'd strongly recommended getting [back] into lifting. Unlike other sports with lifting you can see noticeable progression relatively quickly especially for beginners and there's always new goals you can set out to achieve. In my experience people who lift are the most positive minded and humble people I've ever met, just to be the that atmosphere would be good for you. I'm sure people on this forum myself included would be happy to help if you decided to get back into exercising. Take care.

yes, first i need to find my main goal. things that may lead to my real job in the future.

i am glad you read my stuff on the fitness thread. i was trying to lift, but i was disappointed when i couldn't hold my weight up. i was obese, if not an overweight. that's when i turned to running. but man it's not easy. my inner leg bone hurts and weight wasn't going down as quickly as i thought. i need to control my food consumption as well.  

Posted by Conquest

Graal leads to depression because it lacks content. The collective unconsciousness has a very real interpretation of "Holy Graal"; it represents something deeper, richer, holy, powerful, magical, and more meaningful. A virtual reality follows similar if not nearly exact principles of the drama of the theater of society. However, what happens a lot of times is that what is created in the spirit of goodness, gets finagled by actors/power-hungry men & turned into a cheap thrill. They take the beauty of the unfolding reality, hijack it, and then amp up the economic obsession to create a hamster wheel.

America, first of all, is a land of pirates; pirates flew across the sea, hijacked some land, and created a casino reality. Sure, it's amusing, and very stimulating, but in the end it is a hamster wheel of emptiness if you "go with the flow"—and it is meticulously designed to be so, because those who took power want you to continue throwing quarters into an unrewarding experience that appeals to lust & gore.

But it isn't reality; it's an ensemble of smooth-talking narratives for groups of "rulers" battling against each other in the name of "peace" & "glory". America worships the theater; and the person who controls the server here does as well. He took what was made and amped up people's obsession with vanity (clothing/lust) & gore (fighting) to milk them for money among something that was intended to be way more spiritual; inspiration only comes to the spiritual.

Thus, you enter into the beauty of what innocence makes—the stunted dawning of something much more rich, religious, and transcendent—but in the end you find yourself running around a hamster wheel of incomplete, hijacked economic power plays in a casino designed specifically to hook & entertain you without rewarding you. It leads to depression, because you invest so much time & entertainment into it; your subconscious sees the beauty & purity created by innocence—but unlike Zelda, the game was stolen long ago to be nothing more than a drug to keep pumping you with adrenaline & arousal after good people made something beautiful.

You become tired. You look around you in real life & see that capitalism is the same thing. A bunch of mindless drones being told "they can be kings too if they work hard enough", obsessed with the latest fashion, technology, and entertainment—zipping around—but missing something very, very deep. You go to bed at night, your parents come home from serving a dollar all day & party it up in the night—keeping you awake—& you feel like nothing but a tool in a machine.

I see why you're depressed. Then, you look out into the land of pirates who want your power, and they offer you hope for a high price in the name of advanced education … And you wonder what your purpose is going to be. You go to the churches, and it's the same thing that happened before Rome collapsed. A bunch of people in suits barking manipulated interpretations of something religious to milk people in an addiction for a dollar.

Anime is slightly amusing; but then it's riddled with hyper-sexualized, garbage plots, garbage animation, and terribly produced sound-effects because a bunch of capitalists wrung it together to make a quick dollar.

When you get to the rabbit hole, and everyone says, "Don't go in, it's a trap!"—
I say—follow the little white rabbit.

If there's anyone you don't want to take psychological advice from it's this guy ^^  

Find a new hobby like pixeling  

shuuuuuutt uuppppppppp  

Posted by Its_Nanner

Find a new hobby like pixeling

good suggestion. it was something that i tried two years ago and i got stressed out. i am good at stealing, copying, making similar stuff. but am never creative or good at coloring or shading pixels.

maybe pencil sketch, something i would give a try.  

Posted by Dusty

If there's anyone you don't want to take psychological advice from it's this guy ^^

Coming from a man who sits in my kingdom, serving a child laboring thief who became a multi-millionaire turning their God-given spirit into a casino, for free with your gifts to amuse himself with an artistic gift that should be dedicated to God, not the devil. But, you know, us shamans 'n everything I'm sure you have enough narcissists to back up your claim  

Yeah Dusty get out of his Kingdom!

And Zet, I would agree with Rufus in the sense that I recommend seeing a doctor or multiple doctors about this, and see what they have to say about it.  

Posted by Conquest

Coming from a man who sits in my kingdom, serving a child laboring thief who became a multi-millionaire turning their God-given spirit into a casino, for free with your gifts to amuse himself with an artistic gift that should be dedicated to God, not the devil. But, you know, us shamans 'n everything I'm sure you have enough narcissists to back up your claim

Are you trying to refute my claim? 'Cause you're doing a pretty bad job.  

Posted by Conquest

Graal leads to depression because it lacks content. The collective unconsciousness has a very real interpretation of "Holy Graal"; it represents something deeper, richer, holy, powerful, magical, and more meaningful. A virtual reality follows similar if not nearly exact principles of the drama of the theater of society. However, what happens a lot of times is that what is created in the spirit of goodness, gets finagled by actors/power-hungry men & turned into a cheap thrill. They take the beauty of the unfolding reality, hijack it, and then amp up the economic obsession to create a hamster wheel.

America, first of all, is a land of pirates; pirates flew across the sea, hijacked some land, and created a casino reality. Sure, it's amusing, and very stimulating, but in the end it is a hamster wheel of emptiness if you "go with the flow"—and it is meticulously designed to be so, because those who took power want you to continue throwing quarters into an unrewarding experience that appeals to lust & gore.

But it isn't reality; it's an ensemble of smooth-talking narratives for groups of "rulers" battling against each other in the name of "peace" & "glory". America worships the theater; and the person who controls the server here does as well. He took what was made and amped up people's obsession with vanity (clothing/lust) & gore (fighting) to milk them for money among something that was intended to be way more spiritual; inspiration only comes to the spiritual.

Thus, you enter into the beauty of what innocence makes—the stunted dawning of something much more rich, religious, and transcendent—but in the end you find yourself running around a hamster wheel of incomplete, hijacked economic power plays in a casino designed specifically to hook & entertain you without rewarding you. It leads to depression, because you invest so much time & entertainment into it; your subconscious sees the beauty & purity created by innocence—but unlike Zelda, the game was stolen long ago to be nothing more than a drug to keep pumping you with adrenaline & arousal after good people made something beautiful.

You become tired. You look around you in real life & see that capitalism is the same thing. A bunch of mindless drones being told "they can be kings too if they work hard enough", obsessed with the latest fashion, technology, and entertainment—zipping around—but missing something very, very deep. You go to bed at night, your parents come home from serving a dollar all day & party it up in the night—keeping you awake—& you feel like nothing but a tool in a machine.

I see why you're depressed. Then, you look out into the land of pirates who want your power, and they offer you hope for a high price in the name of advanced education … And you wonder what your purpose is going to be. You go to the churches, and it's the same thing that happened before Rome collapsed. A bunch of people in suits barking manipulated interpretations of something religious to milk people in an addiction for a dollar.

Anime is slightly amusing; but then it's riddled with hyper-sexualized, garbage plots, garbage animation, and terribly produced sound-effects because a bunch of capitalists wrung it together to make a quick dollar.

When you get to the rabbit hole, and everyone says, "Don't go in, it's a trap!"—
I say—follow the little white rabbit.

holy **** this guy is my messiah  

Posted by Fulgore

Yeah Dusty get out of his Kingdom!

And Zet, I would agree with Rufus in the sense that I recommend seeing a doctor or multiple doctors about this, and see what they have to say about it.

Rufus is an atheist; if you want to prescribe to capitalist solutions, they will drug you up, mark you down as unstable, and tinker with your body's chemistry.

The solution is art & magic—it always has been. & Dusty doesn't have to get out of my kingdom; I love him the way he is. I just think that one day he'll wonder why he spent so long contributing to the power of an ungracious man.

Perhaps he rationalizes it away as fun, or an experience—or something on his resume … But in the end, your soul knows when it's been prostituted.

Posted by Dusty

Are you refuting my claim? 'Cause you're doing a pretty bad job.

I don't refute your claim; I am the king of madness. I am Dionysus' mother f***ing horse.  

Posted by Zetectic

yes, first i need to find my main goal. things that may lead to my real job in the future.

i am glad you read my stuff on the fitness thread. i was trying to lift, but i was disappointed when i couldn't hold my weight up. i was obese, if not an overweight. that's when i turned to running. but man it's not easy. my inner leg bone hurts and weight wasn't going down as quickly as i thought. i need to control my food consumption as well.

Nothing happens overnight. You gotta keep at it especially with weight loss. I would strongly recommend not running if you're having problems with it. I personally hate running it's one of the most boring things imaginable, you could instead substitute in another form of cardio. Using an Elliptical machine or even a row machine would be far better, and with most elliptical machines you can adjust the resistance to make it more difficult. This allows you to burn more calories in a shorter time frame.You can even buy a skipping rope, they're pretty cheap and you can use them almost anywhere. But cardio should really be done after your lifting session.

I think your primary focus needs to be diet, there's plenty of methods out there to help with this, personally found a lot of success with intermittent fasting. Although I wouldn't recommend eating a lot of junk food you can get away with eating it and losing weight if you fast. If you do decide to get back into lifting you'll certainly lose a fair bit of weight and gain some muscle especially in the first six months. I'm happy to share whatever knowledge I have on the topic, however limited it may be.  

Absolutely agree with everything Dae said. Especially with mild depression, I think going to the gym, get more sleep, eat better, more daylight etc. are very effective and even enough to not require any other form of treatment. It might take a few weeks to kick in, but trust me, it's highly likely that exercise will make you feel better.

Posted by Zetectic

yes, first i need to find my main goal. things that may lead to my real job in the future.

You have to try a lot of different things. Explore different things and see what you like. You should concentrate on building life skills and stacking those skills on top of one another and employ them concurrently. That's how you win at life.. Life isn't about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself.  

Welcome to my every day life.
I've had this happen to me for around 6 years now it used to be a mood depending on the day but I've now had this 4 months straight.

I have experiences in the past which gave me social anxiety and trust issues so I personally contacted a therapist for it.

I suggest trying to keep going outside and doing outside activities. I personally feel a lot better after doing so, so it might help you too.

If you can't get out of it then contact a doctor and see where things take you, perhaps all you need is to talk and be motivated by someone to do things.  

Posted by Sardon

When your at the point where you compare a 2D mobile game to the fall of rome.
And complain about how america itself is a lie on a forum for 12 year olds who are looking to get a reputation on graal.

Makes you a sad being.

Il bet you 1k gralat that conquest will reply with a long ass essay that I won't even bother to read.

Ignore this dude Antago ^ haters gonna hate bro.

Posted by Conquest

Graal leads to depression because it lacks content. The collective unconsciousness has a very real interpretation of "Holy Graal"; it represents something deeper, richer, holy, powerful, magical, and more meaningful. A virtual reality follows similar if not nearly exact principles of the drama of the theater of society. However, what happens a lot of times is that what is created in the spirit of goodness, gets finagled by actors/power-hungry men & turned into a cheap thrill. They take the beauty of the unfolding reality, hijack it, and then amp up the economic obsession to create a hamster wheel.

America, first of all, is a land of pirates; pirates flew across the sea, hijacked some land, and created a casino reality. Sure, it's amusing, and very stimulating, but in the end it is a hamster wheel of emptiness if you "go with the flow"—and it is meticulously designed to be so, because those who took power want you to continue throwing quarters into an unrewarding experience that appeals to lust & gore.

But it isn't reality; it's an ensemble of smooth-talking narratives for groups of "rulers" battling against each other in the name of "peace" & "glory". America worships the theater; and the person who controls the server here does as well. He took what was made and amped up people's obsession with vanity (clothing/lust) & gore (fighting) to milk them for money among something that was intended to be way more spiritual; inspiration only comes to the spiritual.

Thus, you enter into the beauty of what innocence makes—the stunted dawning of something much more rich, religious, and transcendent—but in the end you find yourself running around a hamster wheel of incomplete, hijacked economic power plays in a casino designed specifically to hook & entertain you without rewarding you. It leads to depression, because you invest so much time & entertainment into it; your subconscious sees the beauty & purity created by innocence—but unlike Zelda, the game was stolen long ago to be nothing more than a drug to keep pumping you with adrenaline & arousal after good people made something beautiful.

You become tired. You look around you in real life & see that capitalism is the same thing. A bunch of mindless drones being told "they can be kings too if they work hard enough", obsessed with the latest fashion, technology, and entertainment—zipping around—but missing something very, very deep. You go to bed at night, your parents come home from serving a dollar all day & party it up in the night—keeping you awake—& you feel like nothing but a tool in a machine.

I see why you're depressed. Then, you look out into the land of pirates who want your power, and they offer you hope for a high price in the name of advanced education … And you wonder what your purpose is going to be. You go to the churches, and it's the same thing that happened before Rome collapsed. A bunch of people in suits barking manipulated interpretations of something religious to milk people in an addiction for a dollar.

Anime is slightly amusing; but then it's riddled with hyper-sexualized, garbage plots, garbage animation, and terribly produced sound-effects because a bunch of capitalists wrung it together to make a quick dollar.

When you get to the rabbit hole, and everyone says, "Don't go in, it's a trap!"—
I say—follow the little white rabbit.

Couldn't have put it better myself... gonna spread rep man.