02-24-2016
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Terra Branford
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Next to you
Posts: 3,284
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she goes home, plays Fire Emblem and get a husband on there. For real though, perhaps you can have the guy perform some unexpected romantic action in front of a bunch of people in public? Idk, like bring a **** ton of flowers be like, "Gomen ne, daisuki yo." The girl looked at him like wot? Then in some unexplained way, he breaks physics and make a heart ring out of fire around them and kiss her. She then cries of happiness and they both hug each other while everybody else standing there watching claps. A few minutes later, he explains why he said no before and the reason was his mom didn't let him get a girl but she does now. The girl then tripped because she was shocked and the dude ask, "Are you daijobu?" the girl smiled and they both kissed again |
02-24-2016
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cute frog
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,644
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If you want honesty then the entire plot sounds kinda bland imo. I think it'd be much more exciting if there were some other types of elements in the story. If your teacher/instructor/director is fine with it then I guess it's okay, but in all honesty I think the plot is just overdone.
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02-24-2016
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a majestic bird
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: New York State
Posts: 11
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02-24-2016
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✔️TURBO✔️VERIFIED✔️
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Larunda Relay
Posts: 6,481
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Never go full weeb.
But that ending really needs some work. Are there any guidelines to how the plays are supposed to be written or is it just basically do whatever the hell you want? |
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02-24-2016
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a majestic bird
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: New York State
Posts: 11
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02-24-2016
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In the Bleak Midwinter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Dragonvale
Posts: 1,145
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IM SORRY BUT IS YOUR SIG A HAMILTON REF Also Im an awful play write, and wish I could help more. But in my opinion you definitely need a little bit more going for your story, maybe even a subplot, a boy who is so in love with her he does everything for the said girl, including trying to help her get boy #1's attention. |
02-25-2016
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Samurott da goodest boy
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: United States
Posts: 129
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So, instead of rejecting her at first, he accepts her invite. Night of the dance arrives, she's dressed in a pitch black, sparkling dress. She arrives by herself only to see him there with another girl and she kisses him. (The kiss between the two was unintentional on the guys part.) She storms out sobbing and runs through the streets until she's hit by a car who hadn't seen her. She's in a coma for a month and awoke to his tears falling on her face, but she couldn't move to console him. The doctor arrives and informs her that she had been paralyzed from the waist down and may never walk again. He stays with her through her months of therapy, she stays motivated and would always repeat to herself, "I'll walk." Eventually he proposes to her, and the day of the wedding arrives. She had always dreamt her father would walk her down the isle. She looks up at her father from her wheelchair, tears welling up in her eyes and says, " I'll walk" All this but more in depth, mine was kinda made up on the spot. Hope I maybe helped idk |
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02-25-2016
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Banned
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: fighting alt-right
Posts: 2,570
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02-25-2016
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a majestic bird
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: New York State
Posts: 11
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