![]() |
|
08-16-2014
|
16 |
|
Pixelist
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3,077
|
Recently had the same exact problem with my ex. Except sometimes she would try purposely pissing me off saying how hot other guys were and stuff but then the same night she would tell me she still loves me and stuff (tf right?) So I then got this urge to piss her off sometimes for fun but it wasn't worth it and it was very stupid/immature. So I just stopped messaging her/contact with her in person. She tries messaging me but I pretty much have her on ignore on everything (Facebook, instagram, Kik, skype, viber, etc.) Anything. Now, I know you don't want to end the friendship but have you told her that you still have feelings for her and it makes you uncomfortable when she mentions her boyfriend to you? If not then try it. If she says a smart ass comment back to you or threatens "then leave!" Then do it. She'll realize it sooner or later. Try asking if she wants to hangout in person some day and try keeping her boyfriend out of it. Now, what YOU can do is talk to another girl. What I mean by this is actually try talking to a girl that attracts you. Don't force yourself to like someone because that's just donkey **** coming out of your ass. When you talk to another girl and you both like each other then you're pretty much focused on THAT girl and nothing else. You won't think about your ex or anything else that bothers you. Just that girl. |
|
08-16-2014
|
17 | |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Posts: 5,459
|
|
|
|
08-16-2014
|
18 | |
|
Pixelist
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3,077
|
My last advice though is don't lurk around or stalk her on social media. Seeing pictures of her and her boyfriend can hurt you a **** load (trust me.) To avoid this just do what I suggested by talking to another girl that attracts you. And don't let these feelings get deep into you. Another good way to see if she's using you as a last resort is to simply ignore her until she messages you first w/o her problems being mentioned. |
|
|
08-16-2014
|
19 |
|
Hyrule Knights
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: In your head 24/7
Posts: 6,348
|
|
|
08-17-2014
|
20 |
|
Delteria Manager
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 2,474
|
Sounds to me like you are jealous of people who have fun in relationships O.o. Because nothing is wrong with wanting to date someone who is fun, and it does not hint at them having a "bad future". Nobody wants a boring relationship, and most will only settle with it if 1: Boy is rich 2: Babies 3: Marriage |
|
08-17-2014
|
21 |
|
Dark Desert Fox
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: United States, Ohio
Posts: 5,720
|
Being friends with your ex can be difficult. Even if you feel you've let go, your heart has a different opinion on the matter. I'm not a love expert, but I completely know the feeling you are having right now. Feelings of jealousy tugging at your heartstrings wondering whether your friendship outweighs the pain. There's no simple answer. If you end the friendship you will probably suffer a period of regret having lost that friendship. On the other hand, if you stay you could continue to constantly get feelings of jealousy and suffer. I hope it all works out for you. Reach a decision that will make YOU happy.
|
|
08-17-2014
|
22 | |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Posts: 5,459
|
You're right - there's no simple answer. The only thing I can do is tell her my feelings and hope she'll comply. |
|
|
08-17-2014
|
23 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 1,992
|
|
|
08-17-2014
|
24 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Posts: 5,459
|
|
|
08-17-2014
|
25 |
|
:)
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: no.
Posts: 10,309
|
I think the best thing you can do for yourself is move on. I was kinda like you in my first relationship, and the girl actually did break up with me for the exact same reason as your ex's (we hugged once). I didn't read too much but Im guessing this is your first relationship? In which case you really need not worry, your first few aren't going to be the best, and looking back on them they will seem horrible. I really dont suggest waiting till you find that special someone, you gotta get yourself out there, get some experience with girls, not saying to do things you're not comfortable with, if you don't want to make-out or go anywhere sexually till you've found someone special that's your thing. But really you just need to get experience with dating and learning how to be a fun person in a relationship, because, not to be rude and really hopefully not say anything that'd hurt, the girl you were dating may not have thought you were that fun of a person to date. You don't need to stop talking to her, or anything like that, you just need to understand that maybe, and most likely that guy she's dating now has had prior relationship experience and is able to comfortably kiss/make-out because he has done it before. And if it's that she's your ex and you have feelings for her, get over it, it may be hard or take awhile but if you plan on going into another relationship you really can't still be missing that girl. Theres tons of other nerdy fishes in the sea that I'm sure would love to date a cool nerdy guy like yourself. TL;DR: Don't hold anything against yourself, its all about getting experience and moving on. You'll have some relationships you really liked, but its best not to feel bad about them and just keep moving on. |
|
08-17-2014
|
26 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Posts: 5,459
|
MrSimons, I think I'd have to agree with this too. There are plenty of girls who asked me put previously, but before I was much shyer. If I think about it, I can probably jump in another relationship with no issue.
|
|
08-17-2014
|
27 | |
|
✔️TURBO✔️VERIFIED✔️
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Larunda Relay
Posts: 6,481
|
Of course relationships shouldn't be boring but if you only like a person because they're fun, you've clearly got a problem. Might as well date a theme-park manager. |
|
|
08-17-2014
|
28 | |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Posts: 5,459
|
I don't want the relationship to end between them because of my stupid reason. I want them to be happy, and if she genuinely wasn't happy with me, then I somewhat understand her motives. Right now, I told her something was going on with me (this issue), and she was willing to listen and be there for me. I am not going to tell her yet, but the fact that she's willing to help me with my problems just makes me not want to break our friendship up. So, I think I have enough advise. Here's what I'm going to do.
Thank you so much. I really love that there is a community out there willing to help those in need of social advise. I love all of you guys. |
|
|
08-17-2014
|
29 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 3,204
|
I don't think dating multiple girls really gives you "experience" everyone enjoys different things and acts different in relationships, you can never understand women and it is a scientific fact. Anyways, hopefully everything turns out all right I was in the same boat except she wasn't my ex just a close friend I really liked. |
|
08-17-2014
|
30 | |
|
Coder
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 901
|
|
|