I'd expect a sparrer to know that a simple run and swing will knock whoever you hit back. Problem solved.
Most of your other complaints are solved by 1.5 seconds of invulnerability and realizing your are one player against 10-50.
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But you forget that there are usually two or more defenders, my dood. One is usually right behind the other. They just continue to cycle in while attackers are busy trying to push through. If a defender dies, they'll be upstairs and back to defend in less than 10 seconds.