I'm confused, was that the story? Or was that a log (check the logs!) between you and another collaborator who was helping you with the story? Regardless, you need to work more on capitalization of the first words in sentences. Also i'm -> I'm. You also need to use quotation marks when quoting what a character says. Example: "This is an example," said The Orator.

This felt more like a script versus an actual story. A story does not have to directly tell the audience who is speaking, or can give context clues as to who it may have been. In script form, others can jump in at any given time without any introduction at all. I'll try and see if I can revise later it to show you what I mean.