My Coming Out Story
Today I want to share a personal story to you guys thats been really painful the last few days. This is something that happened recently in my life that some of my irl friends don't even know about yet. So here it goes I guess.
I have always lived in an extreme Christian household and I always tried my best to adhere to our view of chastity. However, when I was 13 I found out I was gay. I didn't want to tell my mother because they always said that it was a sin and I would never be allowed back home if I was gay. My dad is a heavy drinker and an alcoholic and would probably beat me if he found out. I was scared that they would send me off to some place to try and 'fix' me or something. I kept this a secret for five whole years, and I tried my best not to get off with gay stuff. I tried and tried to make myself straight, but I couldn't. I don't have a job and they are paying for my college education. I felt scared because I can't find a job anywhere and I don't want to lose my college education.
So a couple of nights ago my worst fear came true. I was visiting them and my mom came across my journal and read something I wrote when I was 14 or so. She banged on the door of my room and barged in. At this point, I could no longer hide the truth from her. I finally told her I was gay and I couldn't help it. She was scared, she reacted pretty angrily, and called my dad, who was even more furious, plus to make matters worse, he was drunk at the time, and came come shortly after and beat me. I have some pretty bad bruises right now that I don't know how to come up with an excuse for. I was pretty sure they were about to disown me or something worse. My mom sat me down in my room and she said "You're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air". I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could tell that this cab was rare but I thought now "Forget it. Yo Holmes, to Bel Air!" I pulled up to the house at around 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie "Yo Holmes, smell ya later!" I looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on the throne as the prince of Bel Air.
Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this.
|
